A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

And a video says it even better!


I could have never imagined yesterday that this could be possible today.  What a difference a day makes!  Graysen is the toughest, most determined little thing I've ever seen.  She's amazing and ready to move this process along.

Here is Graysen walking for the first time after surgery.  What incredible progress!  It has been a good day.

Your prayers are working, so please keep them coming.  We are thankful beyond words.

Graysen has wanted to play the game "Pits and Peaks"  with us, while she is lying in her hospital bed.  The way you play is everyone goes around and shares their Pit of the day (the worst part) and their Peak (the best part).  This is Graysen's Young Life Campaigner group's favorite game to play, which they did almost every Wednesday night when they met.

Today when we played, everyone in the room said that Graysen walking was their Peak.  Except Graysen.  She informed us that the walking may not have been as fun for her as it was for us!  Her Peak was her sweet nurse, Tiffany.

She was also just completely thrilled and touched to receive flowers, cards, a turtle ballon, a fruit basket, a letter in the mail from a sweet friend, and various other gifts throughout the afternoon.  It made her day! 

She also asked us read all of the sweet and supportive messages everyone has been sending through texts, emails, twitter, instagram, and Facebook.  

Graysen has felt so loved and cared for by all of you, and by her family who is here with her in person, helping her through this trial.  

It really means the world to her that she doesn't have to go through this alone.

Unfortunately, the Pit has come now that it's evening.  Graysen has walked twice.  They have removed one of her IVs and several other things that were making it easier for her.  She has had her breathing treatments increased and O2 line decreased.  They have reduced and changed her pain meds.  They have rolled her from her back, to her side, back and forth, several times.

The pain has caught up with her from a very busy, strenuous day.  She is tired.  Please pray for a restful night.

Graysen and Nurse Tiffany

"Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever.  Amen."    Ephesians 3:2-21

Steps in the Right Direction

Roller coasters. I've never liked them.

We've been on one today.

Our day started after a long, rough night.  The pain has been intense and Graysen has really suffered. It's been hard on her and hard on us.  She hasn't wanted to eat and could barely move without pain.  Breaths were shallow and slow.  Blood pressure up.  Fever.

It's that part of the roller coaster ride that scares me to death. The part I hate.  The reason I don't ride them.

Next, came the physical therapist. It was time for Graysen to sit up, stand up, and move to a wheelchair. He was great and gave perfect instructions for her to follow. He helped her, along with the nurses, and Graysen was such a trooper! She followed the instructions to the letter and she did great.  It was such a relief to see her conquer this first step towards recovery.  A big first step.  The part of the roller coaster that I like...the slow, steady part.

But the ride wasn't over and we hadn't hit the worst part yet.

In an attempt to get the pain under control after all the moving, Graysen's pain meds were increased.
That's always a tricky thing, and in this case, it ended up as one of those scary parts of the ride.

Graysen was kinda over-medicated at this point and the PA was very concerned.  She told us that her meds all needed to be reduced so that she could wake up more and breathe more easily.  She was very unhappy about Graysen's readings and current state. She would have to bear a little more pain in the interest of making steps in the right direction.

As the mom, that whole conversation was very upsetting.  I didn't want her to be in pain again, but I also didn't want her to be over-medicated.  I can't tell you how many times in the last 24 hours the thought has repeated in my head that we should have never done this, why did we do this, this is a huge mistake.  Another difficult and scary part of the ride.

So, Aunt Gina and Peyton took me to the cafeteria to get some lunch and a break.

When we came back, Graysen was doing so much better.  Tim had her awake, eating a sweet potato, and drinking water. He had talked about the pain and medication situation, and the need to start moving forward.

It was time to stand up and move again.  The PT came back and started the process all over again.  But, this time she had an audience.  Peyton, Colton, Hope, and Marlea were visiting and wanted to see Graysen stand up and move to the chair.

This is when the roller-coaster did that whole upside-side-down and loopity- loop thing!

Graysen sat up, stood up, and transferred to her wheelchair like a pro.  She did absolutely great!

Hope was a different story.  I was just telling Graysen that maybe Hope could braid her hair really cute when I heard Tim say, "Hopey, are you okay? Uh-oh. Okay, she's passing out. Come on guys let's lay her down".

Well, that created quite the excitement! They called a code over the intercom and then came an army of ER personnel.  It was an exciting half-hour of making sure Hope was awake and okay.

Sweet Graysen kept saying, "I'm sorry I can't help Hope.  I'm sorry I'm not helping.  I feel bad I'm not helping her".

Sweet thing. Always worried about everybody else.

Well, like most roller coasters the most exciting part is towards the end.

The room finally cleared.  Everything and everyone was fine.

Graysen had endured all the excitement.  She was still sitting in the wheelchair.  She had earned a promotion.



Time to leave the PICU and move to a regular room.

A huge step in the right direction.

See ya PICU!

"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of Christ Jesus for you."

1 Thessalonians 5:18

"He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might He increases strength.  Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young ones shall fall exhausted; but they who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with the wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

Isaiah 40:29-31

Let the Healing Begin

As Shawna and Tim are bedside with Graysen this evening, Graysen asked me (Aunt Gina) to give an update.  We finally got to visit with her for a brief time.  Of course, she is a bit groggy from pain meds and left over sedation but she was in her adorable Graysen spirit, despite the pain.

She was concerned about how everyone was doing and anxious to hear about her faithful followers through this blog, Facebook, instagram, twitter, etc....She was adamant that we continue keeping you up to date on her progress.

But that is who Graysen is, always concerned about others, even in her pain and discomfort.

Yes, Graysen had a rough afternoon but we found out why.  Dr. Geck had to make sure that Graysen had full use of her legs, feet and toes before he could administer her pain therapy.  That was a very rough patch that Graysen, Shawna and Tim would be grateful to never have to experience again.

The pain meds are working and although Graysen is having some pain, it's manageable.  That is what we prayed for.  That is what you prayed for.  That is exactly what God had blessed her with 12 hours after this ordeal began.  God is good!

There are some back muscle spasms that will continue to keep her uncomfortable for a while.  That is very normal.

Graysen is anticipating the moment she can stand and see the full results of this surgery, and to see just how much she grew in a day :).  We all are right there with her!

The comfort of being in the PICU at the hospital this first night post surgery is reassuring to all of them.  They have an amazing team of nurses and doctors checking on her often.  The breathing treatments that she has to receive every 4 hours is another matter.  She has to turn onto her side in order for these to be administered.  This is not fun for anyone, especially our sweet Graysen.  So say a prayer for her for this small hurdle to be tolerable.

Your continued thoughts and prayers are appreciated.  Our family is forever grateful for you!

Post op update

Surgery is done.  Dr. Geck says everything went as planned.  He was able to correct her curve as he wanted and he said all went perfectly!  We are thrilled...

Now is the time for pain management, recovery, and healing.

Graysen's pain is at an all time high, which we expected.  So I am asking all of you prayer warriors to continue praying.  Graysen needs it now more than ever.  Tim and Shawna are with her now and giving her as much comfort as they can.  It's hard as parents to watch your children be in such pain.  Pray for them to stay strong during this tough time.

Graysen will be in intensive care overnight and if all goes well will be moved to a regular room tomorrow.  Pray for that too!

Thank you for the overwhelming support from you all!

More updates to come.

The family is comforted by the fact that so many people are still praying for Graysen!  Also, our greatest comfort comes from a Heavenly Father who holds her in His precious hands!

The Time is Now

Graysen shared this with us before she went back to surgery.

Her verse for the day.

But The Lord stood by me, and strengthened me; that through me the message might be fully proclaimed.  2 Timothy 4:17

Arrived at the hospital around 6:30.  They took her back to prep her for surgery and to start the anesthesia.  We just got a call from the nurse that Dr. Geck made the incision.

This is the day that The Lord has made, we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Game Time

They say that wherever you go, that's where you are.

Well, we are in Texas.  Austin, to be exact. And Graysen is having scoliosis surgery tomorrow morning.

The last two days have been spent getting x-rays, CT scan, bloodwork, and an EKG.

We have also eaten some really good food, driven all around the big city of Austin, and have done some shopping (of course!). We've been using the "Brian Miller list of things to do in Austin" - and it's a good one!  (He's a friend of ours, who grew up here and he knows what he's talking about:)

But today, we met with Dr. Geck and made some really big decisions.

He started with the facts.  Graysen has a now 46 degree thoracic-lumbar curve, with most of the curve residing in the lumbar area.  Dr. Geck happens to be a lumbar specialist, so we are in such good hands.

He then talked about our options.  Open versus Minimally Invasive.  L3 versus L4.

We talked for a long time about the pros and cons of Graysen's options.

The Open Procedure allows for better rotation of the vertebrae, but involves more trauma to the surrounding muscles and tissue, more blood loss, and a longer recovery.

The Minimally Invasive Procedure is a shorter recovery, and involves less blood loss and trauma to the surrounding area, but doesn't allow for as much correction.

Now, L3 versus L4.

This is a tough decision.

Going down to L4 will give the best overall correction of the scoliosis.  She will have very little curve by going this far.  Visually speaking, she will look more "normal".  She will be straight.  The curve will be corrected to a point of being almost non-existent.

Stopping at L3 does not give as complete a correction.  She will be left with some scoliosis.  Most likely 15 degrees or less.  Dr. Geck will see it.  We will see it.  Graysen will see it.  But you probably won't. It's a slight curve, and let's face it, nobody's body is completely perfect.  Right?

But, the beauty of L3 is that it gives more mobility, more flexibility.  It will allow Graysen more natural movement.  She will find daily activities a little easier, she won't appear "stiff" and she won't feel that way. The big picture is that long-term - when she is my age, it will allow for a lot more movement and normal motions will not be such a challenge.  Normalcy.  As much as you can expect, while wearing steel rods in your back.

And that's what they are.  Stainless steel rods and screws.  Somewhere in the ballpark of 8-10 inches in length and 5.5 mm in diameter.

So, back to the options.

We talked about BMP (Bone Morphogenic Protein) versus bone taken from her hip (for the bone fusion), pain medications to be used, what anesthesia will be used, hospital stay, recovery time, restrictions, limitations, etc, etc, etc.

Again, the good doctor stayed with us until we had discussed every aspect of what Graysen is facing. He has such a good disposition and calmness and it's quite impressive to see how he puts Graysen at such ease as he talks to her.  He is confident and factual, while at the same time, being caring and funny.  He showed us data, graphs, and images to explain everything we talked about.  He talked to each of us and answered every question we had.  He sat next to Graysen and let her sign all of her paperwork.  He talked about his own daughter and how she wants a jeep someday too! (She's ten).  He made us feel at home and at ease.  It is such a blessing to feel calm, while facing such a huge obstacle that is so scary and life-changing.  Graysen, being the huge Grey's Anatomy fan that she is, has decided to call him McSwaggy - because she says he has lots of swag, with his scrubs and cowboy boots, his hipster glasses, and swoopy hair.  She really likes this guy!

Not only does Dr. Geck have lots of swag, he is also has a lot of heart.

Dr. Geck is the founder of a non-profit organization, called SpineHope.  This organization "is dedicated to bringing advanced spinal treatments directly to underprivileged children around the world".  They provide state-of-the-art treatment to children who would otherwise not receive modern treatment for their complex spinal deformities.  "SpineHope transforms the lives of children worldwide throughout surgery, education, and research".

To learn more about SpineHope, please go to www.SpineHope.org

Dr. Geck is our kind of guy.




But, it was time to make some big decisions.

Ultimately, this is Graysen who has to live with what is done tomorrow.  It is her back, her recovery, her quality of life.  Her choice.

So, she made it.  With Dr. Geck's recommendation, and her Dad and I giving our thoughts, Graysen chose what she wanted.

Tomorrow morning at 8 am, Central Time, Graysen will have Spinal Fusion surgery for the correction of scoliosis.  She has chosen mobility over appearance, and as much correction as possible, without compromising quality of life.

She will have the Open Procedure, stopping at L3.  Graysen is at complete peace with her decision and so are we.

We had originally hoped that Graysen would be a candidate for the MISS procedure, and she is.  However, after reviewing all of the information, the pros and cons, and the longterm prognosis, we are at peace with her decision to undergo the Open Procedure.  We feel like we have done everything we can to give Graysen all of the critical information, every possible option available for the correction of her particular needs, and have sought out the best possible care to give her the very best outcome - both short and long-term.  We have done our homework, found an incredible doctor and surgeon, and we have prayed.  Now it's time to let it be.

It's game on.

We covet your prayers.

Please pray specifically for no complications, that she will wake up easily and not be sick from the anesthesia, and for pain that is bearable and manageable.

Please pray for Dr. Geck and all of the operating team that will be taking care of Graysen.

Please pray for our family as we wait.

Thank you for being a part of #teamgraysen.  We are glad you are with us on this journey:)

"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
 1 Thessalonians 5:18

You Guys

Graysen is Ready

She's been preparing for this for months. She's been exercising to get physically strong. She had been advised to get her core as strong as possible, so it could do the job when the back muscles won't be able to.  Shes's been eating well - to avoid losing weight and to stay healthy. She's been getting rest (well, until Summer in a Week!), she has made tough choices, she has simplified, and she has prayed.  She has prepared herself as best as she could.

She's Ready.

And then there's you guys. You have come to us from everywhere.


We haven't shared our story as a way to throw ourselves a pity party or to try to get sympathy. It's not to say that we have this terrible thing to deal with, or to say that life's not fair.  Actually, it's not any of that. It's a faith story.  Our faith story.

We have confidence in the God who holds our hands.  We know that He is a God with plans for us that we cannot foresee, He allows us to experience life in its fullness -the good, the bad, and the unknown, He gives us beauty and joy, He creates in us a need for Him, He takes us down paths that we didn't choose and that we don't want, and He never leaves us. He draws us near to Him and gives us mercy, peace, and grace.  He allows us to know the pain of hardship and heartache - not as a punishment or cruelty, but as an opportunity for us to experience His presence and healing. You cannot know what it is to have comfort and healing if you have never been alone or afraid or hurt. It is an opportunity for a portion of His glory to be revealed. He is our God.  He is good and kind and fair. He hurts when we hurt. He has promised that He will never leave us or forsake us.

And He has sent you to us. We are blessed and we are ready.


As I write these words, a song I know keeps playing through my mind.

"Our God is an awesome God.  He reigns from Heaven above, with wisdom, power, and love. Our God is an awesome God!"


To say thank you is inadequate.  The outpouring of love, support, and prayer has both overwhelmed and humbled us.  It has been a true gift and blessing.  More than you can imagine.

For months I have cried.  I have worried.  I have dreaded.  I have been full of fear and anxiety and stress, whenever I thought too much about Graysen having this surgery.  I have planned every aspect of this trip that I could possibly have any control of.  I have made arrangements, reservations, and schedules for anything and everything I could think of.  I planned and prepared.  I tried to imagine how on earth I was going to handle this, and every time I thought of that day, I didn't imagine that I would handle it very well.

But something happened.  Actually, a lot of somethings happened.  My Jesus Calling devotional  - the words and scripture just seemed to be exactly what I needed.  The study of Ephesians at church - there were things in there that just gave me strength.  My Bible study group that I recently joined.  It wasn't the study we were doing necessarily - it was some things that were shared.  Some things that really hit me right where I needed it.  Stories of hard things and hard times.  Heartache and loss.  And the story of how a doctor became a Believer because of the way a mom and dad showed their faith, even during the middle of devastating news.  It was that story.  I knew then that it was time to share this struggle and all that Graysen and our family are feeling.  It was time to tell a faith story of our own.

So, I began the Blog.  Graysen's BackStory.

I did it to answer the questions.  To share our trial and explain our decisions.  To share how God has a plan and is guiding us every step of the way.  I did it so you would understand my daughter.  To let you see what is hidden so well.  I did it for her - so she will have this to keep.  I did it for anyone else who may be traveling down this same path and come across this blog.  To help them along.  I did it for me - to help me put into words what I have struggled with it my heart.

I had lots of reasons for doing it, but I had no idea what would come of it.

You.

Support.  Love.  Words of compassion and encouragement.

We have had responses from people we see everyday and people we haven't seen in years.  People who live right next door and people from all over the country.  We know you in so many different ways.  Family. Neighbors. Childhood and high school friends.  College buddies.  Colleagues.  Team-mates.  Babysitters.  People from every church we've ever been involved in.  YoungLife.  Teachers.  Coaches.  Moms and Dads of our friends. Parents of our kids friends. Sunday school teachers.  The guy who does my nails.  And people we don't even know.   You guys are amazing and have made such a difference.

 Prayer.  You are praying for us. We can feel it.


 Graysen is ready.


The calm and peace and strength that we feel can only be explained by prayer.  We cannot believe how differently we feel today than we did three weeks ago.  I guess this is something that I hadn't even realized when I began the blog.  I knew that I felt led to write it, but I had no idea that it would create such an army of prayer warriors fighting this battle with us.  It has leant strength and peace that we could not find on our own.  It has readied us.  God is so faithful.

We leave later this morning.  We take you with us, as you continue to text, email, call, comment, share the blog, and pray.  We take your love and support and we take our confidence in a God who loves Graysen more than we do.

We will do our very best to keep the blog up to date and keep everyone informed.  We ask that you pray for a clear answer for which procedure is best for Graysen.  Please pray for everything to go according to plan.  Please pray specifically for NO complications. For manageable pain and no sickness after surgery.  Please pray for an easy wake up for Graysen and a strong recovery.

Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of our hearts.



We love you all:)

"These things I have spoken unto you, that in me you might have peace.  In this world you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world."  John 16:33

Summer in a Week

Graysen has been working on a list for weeks.

It has been lying on her bedside table, right alongside her Bible and journal.  For the longest time I didn't know if this list was for real or just some wishful thinking on her part.  Or, maybe just a coping mechanism.  I wasn't sure and I didn't ask.

It seemed like one of those personal things that Graysen was just working out for herself.

It was entitled "Pre-surgery Bucket List".  

It was a whole variety of activities, which included everything from simply wearing high heels to as crazy as cliff jumping at the lake.  And plenty in-between.  

The list.  It made me sad.  I didn't read it.  I didn't want to know what it said.  It just killed me that my 18-year old daughter was making a "Bucket List".  Because a bucket list is what you make when you are running out of time.  When you may not have another chance.  It's your last chance to do some things that you really want to.  I didn't like it and I didn't want to think about it.

But, Graysen did want to think about it.  And she wanted to do it.  All of it.  Everything on that darn list is exactly what she wanted to do before she couldn't.

So she did.

She called it "Summer in a Week".  

She had actually checked off some of the list before this week - such as wearing high heels.  She did that at graduation.   She wore a backless dress to her Senior Banquet.  She napped in her eno, got in the hot tub, and went to zumba with her friends.  We took the front part of her roof off of her jeep a few weeks ago, so she could enjoy the beautiful spring weather.  She was checking off that list with purpose.  She got a lot of it done.

And then time started running out.

She had one week left until we were to leave for Texas and a whole lot of activities still on her list to do.  And that determined, over-achiever daughter of mine was not leaving without getting that list checked off.

It started Monday.  

Day 1:

Graysen and Peyton work at the cutest little gift shop in Maryville, called Dandy Lions.  They love working there.  They get to meet and see lots of people, sell wonderful products, they have great co-workers, and they love their boss.  It's a great job.  

Graysen worked her last day until who-knows-when on Monday.  As usual, it was a fun day of waiting on customers, seeing some new faces and lots whom she knows very well.  She had a great last day and will really miss getting to be there this summer.  

Monday night Graysen spent the evening having "sissy" time with Peyton.  They went to dinner and a movie.  They loved their night together:)

Tuesday.

Day 2:  My day with Graysen.  She wanted to get a massage, since she won't be able to do that again for a long time.  She and I went to the spa and then to her favorite restaurant, Tomato Head, for dinner.  We sat out on the patio and enjoyed what was a perfect spring evening.

That night, our dear friends Tracy and Leslie came over and we had girl night by the fire.  We sat outside and talked and laughed for hours.  It was a really good night:)

Wednesday was a big, fun day. 

Day 3:  Tim took Graysen and a whole boat-load of her friends to the lake.  They tubed, they ate, they cliff-jumped. They laughed til they cried.  They came back wet, dirty, and happy.

But that wasn't enough.  There was still a lot to do on this list.  And just a little bit of time.

So, on Wednesday night Graysen and her friends headed over to Jump Jam to jump on trampolines for hours.  

The evening was not complete until Graysen and her friends had a sonic Reece's cup blast at 11:00!

She slept well that night, to say the least.

Thursday.

Day 4:  Dollywood.  Roller-coasters.  That's a biggy because she probably won't ever do that again.  It was the last time and one of her favorite things to do.  She rode them all.  Even on the front row.

The evening was spent outside again.  Sweet friends from my supper club came over and brought Graysen a care package of things to take to Texas.  Another great evening with dear friends:)

Friday.

Day 5:  Graysen and I made a rode trip to watch Colton's soccer team play in the state championship game.  In true cheerleader fashion, Graysen dressed in the team colors, cheered loud, and yelled at the other team and the refs.  She held out hope of a win right down to the bitter end.  Then she hugged her brother, prayed along with the team, and told several players how well they played.  A real cheerleader at heart.

Saturday.

Day 6:  Everything else.  It was crazy busy.  Graysen started her day with a pancake breakfast with her campaigner girls.  She came home and she and I, along with Peyton and Tyler, headed off with our dogs to Market Square.  Graysen bought flowers in a can, tasted some yummy samples, and walked around to see as many of the vendors as she could.  She said the prayer at lunch, thanking God for the ability to walk around and see beautiful things.  Oh my heart.

After lunch we headed home, Graysen made a quick change and she and her crew headed off to the mountains for an afternoon of hiking.  They went to Spruce Flats Falls, having a blast playing in the waterfall and enjoying the beauty of God's creation.

Saturday evening Graysen's friend, Hannah, had a bonfire at her house.  It was a relaxing evening and a chance for Graysen's friends to see her and wish her well before her trip.

Graysen came home tired.  That list was checked off.

Sunday.

Day 7:  The Sabbath.  The day of rest.

We started our Sunday as a family, going to church.  It was awesome.  It was like the service had been laid out for us.  The music was perfect.  Every song was incredible and moving.  The sanctuary was packed full of people who were singing and raising their hands in worship.  The sermon was great.  One of the college ministers preached from Ephesians.  The sermon was interesting, funny, serious, thought-provoking, and challenging.  An elder prayed with Graysen after the service.  It was a good day in the House of the Lord.

Sunday afternoon was so good it's hard to describe.  Family and friends came and went all throughout the afternoon and even into the evening.  They hugged us and told us they love us.  They brought cards and gifts and care packages for Graysen.  They gathered in circles and prayed.  Graysen and Nathan sang.

Blessing upon blessing upon blessing.  We are blessed.

Summer in a Week was a success.  The list is checked off.  Graysen got to do the things she had thought about and wanted to do, she did the things that she has always loved or had always wanted to try, she did the things that she will never be able to again.

She made the most of every single minute and made them count.  

She gave love and received it back times by at least a thousand.

It was a great week.

That list wasn't so bad after all...

Going to get a massage

Lake Day!

Cliff Jumping

Jump Jam

Dollywood

Supper Club Friends

Soccer Championship

Market Square

Hiking

Spirit Lead Me...

Sweet Friends and Family

The List

Graysen and Nathan singing Redemption Song:

A Song of Encouragement for Graysen over the past several months.

Oceans Hillsong United

"But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, "You are my God."

Psalm 31:14

Let me tell you about my girl, Gray

Graysen Caroline McConnell

The girl with the crooked back is my daughter.  My second daughter.  She has a big sister, Peyton, and a little brother, Colton.  She's the middle child. She's the peacemaker in the family and beautiful and smart and complex.  She has faith that is deep and wide and real. You have read about her trials and what she has to face, but I want to say a little more about my sweet girl.

If you don't already know Graysen, then please allow me a moment to share with you one of my favorite people on earth.

Graysen is busy.  She likes it that way.  She has a lot of energy and huge ambition - and the exact right frame of mind.   She just graduated high school and will be a freshman at Lipscomb University in Nashville, Tennessee in the fall.  She can't wait!  She cheered in high school and had hoped to cheer at Lipscomb, but as we all know, that is not going to happen.  So instead of being all down-and-out about that, she's looking forward to all the other possibilities for her.  She's looking for God's direction -  for where He wants her to invest and what to put her energy into, and for new friends He  wants her to learn to love.

She's ready.

Graysen is a sweetheart.  She has always been loving.  She came into the world that way.  She's happy.  She's up way more than she's down.  She's smiling and pleasant and giving.  Even when she's in pain.  She doesn't complain.  Most people are shocked to find out all that Graysen has been going through because she seems so "normal" and she seems happy.  Well, she is happy and I am so amazed by how well she handles all that she has.

Graysen is somewhat of a puzzle, though, I think.  She is extremely outgoing, friendly, confident, and adventurous.  But, ever so private when it comes to things that are personal.  She's guarded with her thoughts and feelings.  She hides that she's in pain and she continually puts a positive spin on hard things and hard people. She gives second chances - more than once.  She forgives easily and moves on.  She makes friends and keeps them.  She laughs easily and often, and she leaves the sweetest notes for me all around the house for no reason at all.

I love that.  It's one of my favorite things.

She's bright.  So bright.  In so many ways.

I have a very close friend, Vallie, who's hubby loves to put nicknames on people.  He calls me "junky" or "junk mama" (lovely, huh?!).   She has told me to take it as a compliment because he only gives nicknames to the people he really likes.  Well, Graysen seems to be someone who people just naturally end up nick-naming.  I'm gonna assume that's a good thing and that people really like her!


When Graysen was born her daddy started calling her "Peanut".  I'm not sure why exactly, especially since he had chosen her name in the first place.  It stuck, and he still calls her that.  She recently saw a necklace with a peanut charm and told me she wanted it.  I couldn't figure out why.  She said, "Because that's what Daddy calls me!  I'm Peanut!".  Oh, yeah.  Of course:)

By the time Graysen was big enough to start talking, but small enough to still be sleeping in her crib, she had already figured out the baby monitor.  She realized that if she crawled to the end of her bed and spoke into the little white box, someone would come get her.  She would wake up, crawl down, and start announcing, "I awake! Ho me, ho me, ho me!"  That is translated - "Hold me, Hold me, Hold me!".  My Nana thought that was so adorable and she lovingly referred to Graysen as "Homie".  (Nana was way ahead of her time!).  Recently, we were shopping and saw a t-shirt that said Homie on it.  Of course, Graysen had to have it - that was Nana's nickname for her!

I call her GrayGray, Graycie, Graycie girl.  Peyton calls her "Sissy" and Colton called her "Dracie" when he was little.  He cried his heart out when his "Dracie" left him and went to kindergarten.  He would run across the hall to her room when he woke up and call for her, just to end up broken-hearted that she wasn't there.  He calls her "Gray" on most days now.  So do most of us.  Her friends have all kinds of plays on her name - "G", Graylo and BabyGray being the main ones.  And "Pig-pen".  But that's a whole different story, for a different day...


Graysen is full of faith.  She has a faith that shines bright and reaches out.

Graysen has been very involved in YoungLife during high school.  Her campaigner group met at our house every Wednesday night for four years.  Along with many sleepovers, pool parties, and parent meetings.  She had two incredible leaders, Sara Stokes and Lindsay Mizell, who poured out Christ's love on any girl who ventured into our basement and found a safe place with a special group of young ladies.

Graysen hopes to return all that she has gained by becoming a YoungLife leader herself while in Nashville.

Graysen took it seriously.  She studied.  She memorized scripture.  She learned. She prayed.  She journaled.  She invited.  She reached out.  She shared her heart and her life.  She matured.

Her faith grew tremendously.  She developed deep, meaningful and lifelong friendships.  She loves missions and has been on several mission trips.  She fell in love with Christ again and again. And, unbeknownst to her, God prepared her for this summer.  And for much more.


She's ready.


Graysen is a hard-worker.  She spent hours upon hours studying, writing, and preparing during high school.  Her hard work paid off and she did very well.  She attended a great school and got an incredible education.  She was accepted into the Honors College at Lipscomb and she has big goals and ambitions.  Graysen wants to follow in her Daddy's footsteps and become an oral-surgeon.  She loves to sit with her daddy and hear all about the interesting things he does.  And she's not grossed out like me!  It's a long and difficult road, but I have no doubt that she is totally capable and will be awesome.

She's ready.


Graysen is fun and gifted.  Mostly because she's happy and positive. She's pleasant and she's good company.  She's silly and goofy, and makes crazy faces!  She appears footloose and fancy-free.  She's helpful and thoughtful.  She's tender-hearted, getting her feelings hurt easily.  But, also, sensitive to the feelings of those she cares about.  She loves to bake and makes a birthday cake for all of her friends on their special day.  She's a ton of fun during family games and she is absolutely hilarious when we get the karaoke machine out!  She can sing for real, and it's one of those things I just can't help bragging about.  I love to hear her sing and I think she's so talented!  She calls me a pageant mom and makes me be quiet - ugh.  Her friend, Nathan, comes over and he plays the piano and they sing together.  It's definitely on the list of my favorite things.

You know what else?  She spends time with me.  We do a lot together and we have so much fun.  She invites me for almost everything she does.  She is not one of those teenagers who never wants her mom around, and, believe me, that is not lost on me.  I cherish it.  I cherish who she is.  Last year she said something so sweet to me.  She said, "Momma, when I go to Nashville you can just get an apartment down there and you can come down there every other weekend and I'll come home every other weekend.  That way we don't have to be apart very often!".  Can you believe that?!  Precious.

Well, I smiled and told her how sweet that was for her to say, but that she was not going to want me there that often.  Trust me.

And it's not just me.  She's a family girl.  She loves spending time with her daddy, her "sissy" and her "little man" as she calls Colton.  She goes to as many of his sporting events and school activities as she can.  She goes with me to visit Peyton at Lee.  She even goes to work with her dad, when there's an opportunity, and loves to see pictures and discuss cases from work.  She loves her grandparents and aunts and uncles.  She loves, loves, loves her cousins!

She's a bright light in our family.



The definition of the word Grace is:  an undeserved gift from God.

I wanted her name to mean grace.  Tim and I talked about it for months and came up with our own form of the name.   Most people wouldn't realize the connection, but grace was the foundation for naming our second daughter.  And undeserved gift from God.

And she is.



When Graysen applied for the Honors College at Lipscomb she had to write an essay.  She chose to write about her scoliosis.  There's nobody who can tell her story better than Graysen, herself.  I would like to share her essay with you.

I have a crooked back.  My spine has a 45-degree thoracic-lumbar curve, to be exact.  Although my scoliosis does not define me, it has played a huge role in molding me into the person I am today.  Usually when I tell people about my scoliosis they ask me a series of questions that I have heard just about a billion times: “1. Does it hurt? 2. Can it be fixed? 3. Will you be able to cheer?”

First, yes it does hurt.  My back hurts every day of my life.  Normal activities for someone with a straight spine are not always so normal for someone with a crooked one.  I limit how often I wear high heels (which I love) because one day in cute shoes will result in a week of intense back pain for me.  I rarely stay the night at friend’s house because sleeping on a couch does not always go so well for a crooked spine.  Sometimes I have to finish the singing portion of Sunday morning church service in my seat because I can only stand for a short period of time without sharp pain shooting from my pesky curve.  I hate that I have limitations and always have to think through my decisions based on how it will affect my back.  I hate that it hurts.  Honestly, I usually deny that I am in pain because I hate the pitied looks I receive when I confess that I am hurting. However, there is good news— and a response to the second question—my vexing 45-degree lumbar curve can, and will, be fixed. 

There is an operation called spinal fusion and reconstructive surgery that fixes warped spines like mine.  The surgery takes many hours and uses a system of rods and screws in order to straighten the spine.  Sounds fun, right?  It is an intense procedure with a long list of risks and post-op restrictions.  In total, I will spend a year recovering.  After the first year I will be “released” to be a normal 18 year-old again, but my surgeon says that I will have some life-long restrictions in order to preserve my new spine. One of these limitations is that I will never cheer again.  This little detail answers question three.

“Can you cheer?” may seem like an odd question to you, but if you knew me personally, you would know that cheerleading has enormously impacted my life.  Being a varsity cheerleader throughout high school meant more to me than pom-poms and pep rallies.  I loved cheerleading dearly because it gave me a leadership role and voice to make an impact.  After I made the Maryville High School cheerleading squad my freshman year, I remember thinking that I did not want to be the stereotypical cheerleader who acted like she came straight out of Mean Girls and  dated the quarterback—I wanted to be different.  I wanted to show that I could be a cheerleader while being a good student and a Christian role model in my school.  Cheerleading became my mission field and my opportunity to lead others to Christ.   A few weeks ago, I had an adorable little girl tell me that she was trying out for her intermediate school cheer squad because she wanted to be like me, “a smart, Christian, cheerleader.”  This is exactly the image that I had always hoped to portray.  Because cheerleading was so important to me throughout high school, I always dreamed that I would continue to cheer in college.  However, the news that my back simply could not handle it twisted my plans.

My curved back has taught me some pretty big lessons; my back showed me that sometimes life hurts (a lot) and knocks you down over and over again, but you have to get back up and keep going.  Even though my back hurts, I will not let it keep me from doing the things that I love.  I still wear high heels and spend the night with friends; I refuse to let my crooked spine dictate my life.  However, my back has also taught me that God always has a better plan for me than I have for myself.  I planned to cheer throughout college; since my new back will not allow me to cheer, I have been looking into all of the other campus activities that I will still have the chance to dive into at Lipscomb next fall.  I hope to join a social club and go through Quest to become a Young Life leader.  My back has taught me that I believe in a mighty, mighty God who knows me better than I know myself—a God who knows all my brokenness, and loves me still. “For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).  This verse embodies the greatest lesson that I have learned in the last year.  I am so grateful to believe in the God that makes crooked spines, and also has plans for the girl with the crooked, painful, imperfect, blessed, hopeful, beautiful spine. 

                                                                                    Graysen McConnell

That's my girl.

For a good chuckle go to this link!
http://youtu.be/-XK5eim1evI



"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose".      Romans 8:28